Please do not compare your son to top rated athletes during the recruiting process!

This past week I received an email from a parent comparing his son (now called Athlete A) to another athlete who plays in the same area (now called Athlete B).  Athlete A is a solid high school player.  He rushed for over 900 yards for a team that made the playoffs this fall on the football field.  Athlete A has worked hard and done a nice job on the football field.  He has Division III college coaches interested in his skills.

Athlete B on the other hand received multiple Division I scholarship offers before committing to a program close to home as a sophomore.  He has helped his team to two straight State titles and his club is favored to win their third championship in a row very soon.  Athlete B has moved from position to position during his high school career and is just a freak of nature.  He has rushed for over 1,800 yards this season and will go down as one of the top high school athletes ever to play in his State.

So my first question that popped into my mind when reading this email is what the eff is this dad thinking?  I know parents are the most bias people in the world and can’t see situations regarding their children with a major bias towards their son or daughter.  But seriously, are you kidding me?

This happens all the time and every single time I hear it, read it, or have to speak to someone about it it makes me sick.  One thing I realized a long time ago is that parents can never take the bias out when evaluation their child.  I have seen it from crazy parents who try to live through their son to college coaches who should know what happens during the recruiting process.

I have even written about this multiple times but I still must stress that the one thing that parents and their children need to worry about is the one thing that they can control, themselves.  College coaches are looking for certain things and if an athlete gets an offer who puts up less stats, this player may have been the perfect height, weight, strength, or have the athletic ability that a college coach is looking for.

Here is a great example.  Last year, two quarterbacks who played in the same conference started getting recruiting attention.  One was named All State (now called Recruit A) and another did not even receive All Conference honors (Recruit B).  This year, Recruit A has thrown for over 2,100 yards, 25 touchdowns, and his team is undefeated.  Recruit B has tossed for 891 yards, 12 touchdowns, 6 interceptions, and his season is already over.

By looking at those numbers and stats, you would think picking out the one with the Division I offer would be easy.  But it is the one with the lesser numbers.  Both athletes went to camps this summer and Recruit B did a better job impressing college coaches when it mattered most.  I can bet that Recruit A is bitter about this and I am sure his parents are too.

What this story boils down to is that it is not worth comparing your son to other athletes.  I don’t care if he out gained the athlete going to State University.  It may be a great accomplishment but that doesn’t mean State University will come calling you with a scholarship.  Take care of what you can take care of and don’t compare yourself or your children to other athletes.  It will just end in frustration.

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